I seriously hope this new name, by new owners, is not a reference to the potential chaos they intend to wreak across the SGR/SHR intersection - but if the current building works being undertaken is anything to go by it might just be the case.
I live above this little hotspot of post-pub filth food, and was intrigued to notice that out the back of my kitchen window, they have built a covered back yard with timber and felt. This 6ft by 6ft space is sandwiched on three sides by the bookies, the Stapleton Tavern and a private residence. At first I had no idea what it was, until the other day when I got home form work very late to be greeted by LOUD music and drilling coming from the shop with the door open and a full house of what looked like the owners and their workmen and friends (so far, so Beirut) inside. I adopted my friendly approach and went inside to chat with the two guys who looked like they were in charge. They were very happy to tell me that they have bought the place and intend it to be a great new, better quality take out (and eat in) restaurant. They then invited me 'out the back' to view an area they seemed very proud of. With a mixture of trepidation and intrigue, I walked through to the back of the shop/bomb site to a door covered by hanging tassles. I turned to look back thinking 'is this the room where I die?' to see the two men excitedly gesturing me to enter through the curtain. I poked my head through (thinking 'at least decapitation is QUICK), to be greeted by a thoroughly jolly party of 8 or so people sat on benches facing me and listening to a guy playing bongos, smoking shisha pipes! "Hello", I said nervously, at which point they all looked at each other, looked back at me (SO WHITE, SO NOT THEIR CROWD) and laughed aloud. "HELLO" they chorused back - at which point I scurried out back to the front of the shop.
They have built a smoking den!
The two guys (brothers) in charge said they open very soon. I wished them luck, asked them if they wouldn't mind turning the music down (it was 11.30pm), accepted their offer of a free Lebanese when they opened and shook their hands goodbye.
It all seems very upbeat and positive so far.
HOWEVER (Daily Mail sounding part starts here) - I can't help but think, if they stay open until 3am like kebabilicious did - are we all in for an ear-bashing catastrophe on the scale of environmental health problems never seen before? Just last night, whilst building, they were playing music again. The guy whose balcony backs directly onto the roof of the smoking den came out, banged on it to get the attention of those inside and bellowed for them to turn it off as it was making his floorboards bounce. I can't help but think "here comes trouble"
Which leads me to be ultimate question: How long should I leave it before being a total party pooper and informing the council that there is a BLATANTLY illegally built, hazardous area out the back of a local shop making noise and posing a danger to those inside? If there was a fire at the front of the shop - those in that annex would be totally trapped. Of course, whilst it would be terrible for anybody to die in such circumstance, more importantly than this I need my beauty sleep. I get enough grief of the betting shop cunts out the front without a new problem the other way. I also don't want bloody shisha smoke blowing in through my kitchen window, poisoning me in my sleep.
WHAT SHALL I DO AFTER I HAVE HAD MY FREE KEBAB?
Comments
on the other side, I hate bongos with A PASSION! AND JUGGLERS or anything circusy
They open tomorrow apparently.
I will wait to see how the VERY loud music pans out before I do anything, so as to avoid being a sourpuss.
To the person who said move - fuck off.
Therefore I conclude they won't be open very long at those prices.
I'm pretty confident that they won't have approval for the smoking den too. The old owners of Kebabilicious wanted to get the shish pipe out the back and couldn't get approval, so I'd be amazed if a new owner has instantly got approval
The chap seems very nice, and proudly showed me the shisha smoking area, which looked lovely, as does the restuarant part. He also told me how he loves the rain and heat makes him angry.
Anyway, recommended.
I wish them well.