ranting and raving

hooofck

<p class="MsoNormal">I was walking down Woodstock Road early on Sunday evening when suddenly a man with really long dreadlocks walking a bull terrier started having a go. I was with my Mum, who is 76. He followed us for a few minutes, trying to intimidate us. He said I was showing my Mum the new flat I’d just bought, how nobody wants our sort round here, did I grow up round here, how would we like it if he moved to ‘our’ area etc. Over and over - swearing and aggressive.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Does anyone know this guy? I’m sure I’ve seen him around but I don’t normally don’t walk that way. I wonder how he would react if I started on him in front of his family or friends with a load of completely incorrect accusations based on his appearance.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I honestly don’t know what prompted this outburst – I was wearing some old shorts, t-shirt and trainers. My Mum was dressed quite smart, as old people tend to be, but nothing out of the ordinary. I’m certainly not posh, don’t even have an accent. I just said nothing and kept walking - maybe he has some problems and normally people who are so pumped up and aggressive like this are just looking for a reaction and it only escalates from there. But I have to say that thinking about it and seeing how intimidated my Mum felt, and knowing that I just took it and did nothing to stick up for myself is making me wonder if I did the right thing.<o:p></o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Do I need to justify myself to him? I have lived in Finsbury Park for 17 years, my kids are in the local school, we use local shops, pubs and businesses as much as possible, get involved with lots of local stuff, I even work locally . I understand that there could be some resentment to perceived yuppies / gentrification etc but that really isn’t me. And even if it was, what sort of small town attitude is that anyway? <o:p></o:p></p>

miss annie

Oh, how horrible. Sorry to hear that, even worse that your poor mum was there.

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hooofck

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode', sans-serif; background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Thanks Misscara, but I’m not interested naming and shaming or tracking him down, I am just asking to see if anyone has any similar experience. If it’s something he does regularly then I think he needs to get some help.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode', sans-serif; background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">We’ve all met people who are can be fine to people they like but hateful, abusive and aggressive to other groups of people who they’ve decided don’t belong. Sorry but I don’t find that he can be quite a pleasant character sometimes to be much of a consolation.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode', sans-serif; background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">If I was on my own, I wouldn’t mind nearly as much, and if it was say in the west end, and it was a random few comments then I wouldn’t think anything of it. So normally yeah, I would agree, we shouldn’t take it personally. But near my family home and with a vulnerable member of you family with you, it’s not so easy to forget and brush off as a bit of banter. It wasn’t just a couple things shouted from across the street but a completely unprovoked, sustained barrage of abuse meant to be as intimidating as possible as he followed right behind us shouting with his scary bull terrier for 3 or 4 minutes. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: 'Lucida Sans Unicode', sans-serif; background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">My Mum was really upset – since my Dad died it’s a big deal for her to come up and see us on the train on her own. She is getting on for 80 – I wouldn’t be surprised if she doesn’t come again for a while and I know I’m not looking forward to walking down there next time with my 3 and 5 year old either. And that’s deliberate – that’s what he wanted to happen – to bully us into not feeling safe in the area.<o:p></o:p></span></p>

Sutent

@hoof. Am sorry your mum had to witness that. Totally not acceptable. Shame misscara cant have a word with him when she next sees him

NorthNineteen

That kind of intimidation is not acceptable - as is road rage people suffer from following the speed limit for that matter. I can imagine you did take it very personally, I hope it doesn't happen again.  I've noticed a few interesting characters when I've walked along Woodstock Rd but nothing like you described.

vetski

I think I know who you mean - don't know his name or much about him - and if I am thinking of the same person, he's done this kind of thing before.

ChangN4N6

Bullying . Should be reported to the police . Bring back the stocks. Chang

conformable_kate

How upsetting and horrible. It does sound as if it wasn't actually at all to do with you - nothing you could have changed by looking or sounding different, and nothing based on anything actually about you or your life - it's his issue (and by the sound of it mental instability) and not something to take personally. But of course having your mum around at the time makes it much harder to try and respond, since all you want to do is get the vulnerable person off the scene; and arguing with people in this kind of state doesn't necessarily help anyway. <div><br></div><div>I've never encountered this person myself - Woodstock Rd not my patch... But I'd be surprised if the police weren't aware of him, if this is a pattern of behaviour. Not a lot left in the way of social services, but similarly the may well be on social workers' radar. If it happens again I'd try and find out if there's any kind of intervention possible.<br><div><br></div></div>

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Ali

<P>Anything to do with this</P> <P> </P> <P><A href="http://www.stroudgreen.org/discussion/comment/56050#Comment_56050">http://www.stroudgreen.org/discussion/comment/56050#Comment_56050</A></P>;

NorthNineteen

@misscara I don't agree with a lot of what you say, as I'm you don't with what I say.  That doesn't mean I'm not happy with you and nor does it mean I think we have anything to sort out.  It's a shame we didn't meet at the social though - would have been nice to have put a face to a name.<div><br></div><div>I think I misunderstood what you were saying too, your previous message clarifies it so thanks.</div>

ChangN4N6

This sounds like a Kenny Rodgers song my mum used to play . Chang

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NorthNineteen

I see, you were missed!<div><br></div><div>Slagging you off? I interpreted it as us disagreeing - I can't recall saying anything personal or directed at you that could be taken as slagging off.  If you feel that way I'm genuinely sorry. </div>

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NorthNineteen

Deal.

ChangN4N6

The coward of the county was the Kenny song, it's just come back to me. Chang

miss annie

I like that song. Poor old Becky though.

ADGS

Was the guy a shortarse? If so, I know the one you mean. Absolute prick, though I believe he did build the Fullback's garden so at least his existence isn't entirely without purpose.